Chapter 19 - Fourth Year, Thrice Fallen

Written by Nemesis

As it happened, Professor Dumbledore managed to get Dippet to sign a special permission form so that Tom could spend the next summer holiday at Hogwarts. Tom was ecstatic; this meant that he was exempt from going back to the orphanage. Even though Mr. Carney was back to thinking that Tom was just an ordinary boy, he was sure to be just as much of a cad as usual, and Tom did not want to mix himself up with that again.

He was, therefore, plagued with guilt for not being quite true to his word that he would stop studying so hard. In fact, if anything, he was studying harder, but he was growing used to his abnormal sleeping schedule and was soon back to being perfectly attentive in class. He also made sure that Francis Malfoy was not watching when he sneaked down to the library for his Dark Arts studies, which he decided to slow down with so that he could have more time to look up the Chamber of Secrets. He grew used to being pulled aside by Rubeus, who always wanted to show Tom another dangerous pet he was trying to keep, and to making sure Olive Hornby left Myrtle Potter alone. Tom had rarely spoken to Myrtle, but when he had, he had not liked her much.

His birthday and Christmas flew by, and nothing interesting happened until about mid-February, when Tom went to his usual Divination class. He met Lili near the entrance to North Tower. She looked a little jumpy, but not enough to arouse Tom's worry too much. Professor Camden threw the door open and the class clambered in. As usual, Tom sat with Lili, who was the only friend he had in that class.

"We're finally done with bird entrails," Professor Camden announced. Most of the class cheered; looking at the future through goose guts was not the most appealing work in the world. "We're moving on to palmistry today," Professor Camden continued, jumping around exuberantly. If there was one thing Tom liked about the teacher, it was that she enjoyed doing her job. She explained the fine points of palmistry to them, saying that she would first read all of their palms and next lesson pair them up to read each other's.

The students lined up in front of the professor, and she read them all very enthusiastically. Tom noted with some satisfaction that she told Francis he had a very short lifeline. Lili was second-last, and Tom stood behind her. After exchanging a few whispered words with Professor Camden (who for some reason did not read Lili's palm), Lili headed to the back of the room again, and it was Tom's turn.

Feeling suddenly apprehensive, Tom took a few steps forward. Professor Camden looked at him analytically, her hoop earrings jangling. "I'll need to see your wand hand," she said. When he held out his left, Camden's face went even more cryptic. "Right-o," she sighed, and began.

"Let's see here… your lifeline--oh my! That's… bizarre!"

"What is?" Tom asked curiously. He looked at the palm of his left hand and smiled a bit. It was zigzagged with lines that were completely different from the norm, forming something that looked vaguely like an S.

Professor Camden was at a loss for words for a moment. "Tom, that's… incredible! I've never seen that happen before!" Now she looked excited. "Okay… your lifeline… very long, I must say. But see how it breaks off for about a decade's worth? It suddenly goes very thin… barely even there… then it takes up again."

Tom stared at it. She was right.

"Your head line is also unusual," she continued. "See? It goes in a curve, and it's one of the thickest I've ever seen. I've never seen that before, either. And your heart line--" she hesitated. "It's very thick to start with, and it tapers down till it's as thin as a hair. There are three breaks in it; one is adjacent to the very beginning of your life, the second, to somewhere around ten, and the other one not long after that, maybe four or five years. After that--it isn't there."

"So I get my heart broken three times?" Tom mused.

"Rather… from the depth of the line, all are women." Tom blushed furiously as the class burst out laughing. "None of them, however, signify romantic love. That will never come for you, Tom. After the third break, you will never love again.

"Now, to the fingerprints… all accidentals." She frowned slightly. "Is that the case on your other hand, too? That signifies cunning."

"So what else is new?" someone whispered. Tom could not suppress a small smile.

"Now… to your other… characteristics." Camden looked suddenly grim. "Left-handed?"

Remembering Mr. Ollivander, Tom gave an exasperated sigh. "Yes," he groaned.

"That signifies power in the most extreme sense," Camden responded, her voice very quiet. "It is rare in the world in general, to be sure, but only one wizard in five billion is left-handed." Tom's jaw dropped. "Left-handers are usually extremely powerful… but also violently ambitious. Still, extremely rare. In fact," she said, "there are only three in recorded history; Salazar Slytherin, Lyra Xavena, and Amelbius." Tom stared at her blankly. A Dark Arts-oriented Hogwarts founder, a Dark witch and prophetess, and… the very creator of the Circle of Darkness. No wonder Ollivander had been shocked, it seemed to have Dark Arts connotations…

"That's all," Professor Camden said, giving Tom a sudden, cheery smile that seemed rather forced. Tom nodded so slightly it was almost invisible and walked back to his seat, the eyes of the other Divination students jamming into him like steak knives.

As he sat down across from Lili, he realized that she looked a little weepy. "Is there a problem?" he asked her.

Lili looked up, biting her lip. "I asked Professor Camden--"

"That's Ariana to you, Lili!" Professor Camden called, though she could not possibly have heard.

"I asked her not to read my palm," Lili finished.

"Why?" Tom asked curiously.

"I just don't want to know," Lili said, rocking backward and forward in her chair. Tom tried to get her to explain, but she wouldn't. The bell rang noisily and Tom gave up on her, getting up and leaving. Still, he could not help but wonder. Lili was usually a very cheerful person. If she had been that worried about having her palm read, something else had to be wrong.

********************

However Tom tried to talk her into telling, Lili refused to let him in on what was bothering her. She soon returned to her old self, but Tom could tell she was putting it on to keep from worrying anybody. He spent the rest of the year either in the library, playing Quidditch, or, rarely, with his friends. Usually, he spent time with Lili and Rubeus rather than his Slytherin friends, who seemed to have grown away from him. After exams ended, Tom finally let up on the studying a bit, but the drop in intellectual stimulation affected him rather like withdrawal from an addiction. Thus, when Lili offered to start teaching him Chinese, he accepted the offer, and picked up on the language very quickly.

Tom had a good time at the end-of-year ceremony, feeling better because he knew that he would not have to leave this all behind. The Hall was decorated with blue and bronze, for Ravenclaw had won the House Cup, and for the third year in a row, Tom made the top of the Honor Roll. After the feast, the Slytherins had a rather noisy party. It lasted until four o'clock in the morning, ending only when Professor Chapman turned up in a nightcap and a bathrobe and told them to be quiet so that the Hufflepuffs in the next tower over could get some sleep.

Yawning and sighing, Tom trudged up to the dormitory and sat down on his bed, not really wanting to go to sleep. The sun was already rising, and within minutes the dormitory was glowing with a dull gold. Richard Zabini, whinging like a four-year-old, dropped off to sleep immediately. Francis just sat on his bed and glared out the window, not doing anything. Once in a while, his eyes flicked over to where Tom was sitting. Adrian and Zuhayr sat in the corner, chatting and playing Exploding Snap. After a short time, Tom realized he was a lot more tired than he had thought. Without changing out of his robes, he drifted off to sleep.

He woke up feeling strangely dreamy, as though he had overslept, and it took him a few minutes to realize that it was nine o'clock--that is, in the evening. It was possibly the first decent night's sleep he had had since September of the previous year. Feeling ravenous, Tom changed into Muggle clothes and headed down to the deserted common room. A note was Spellotaped to the wall next to the portrait hole.

We decided to let you sleep in; God knows you needed it. There will be a meal ready for you in the Great Hall whenever you come down.
--The Professors

Yawning, Tom pushed the portrait open and walked through the hallway down to the Great Hall. His footsteps resounded noisily, echoing off the walls, and the corridors seemed strangely empty without the boisterous babble of students. As he reached the Great Hall, he found it deserted as well, which made him feel a little nervous. He sat down at the Slytherin table, and a plate full of food magically appeared before him.

Looking around the Hall, Tom's eyes fell on the stained glass windows. They were really quite pretty, one design for each House. Gryffindor's was of a blond man with a sword and shield. Hufflepuff's depicted a teenaged girl with very curly brown hair who was examining some plants. Tom's favorite had to be the Ravenclaw window; it showed a young woman with flaming red hair and brown eyes, an open book in her right hand, while her left hand rested on a brass telescope. The window for Slytherin was also quite nice. Its subject had black hair and turquoise eyes, and Slytherin, too, was reading a book. A silvery snake had coiled itself around his arm.

After Tom had finished his dinner, he started up to the library, but he halted outside the staff room door. Someone was talking inside. He knew that he should not pry, but his curiosity got the better of him.

"…Dark supporters are getting restless," Professor Dumbledore was saying. "Messages have been found in the sky all over the Isles; 'The Dark Heir Cometh'… 'The Circle is Complete'…"

"I still don't see what it has to do with Riddle," Professor Sevigny replied huffily.

Twiddy took the initiative. "Albus and I have both noticed it… he's definitely in the Circle. If the Dark Heir really is coming, we have to prepare him."

Professor Sevigny hesitated. "Have either of you considered the possibility that he could be this 'Dark Heir'?"

"That's ridiculous!" Twiddy exclaimed. "He doesn't strike me as evil at all. Besides, the prophecy says that the twelfth Dark member will have killed more than one person by the age of fourteen. Tom's fourteenth birthday was in December, and he hasn't murdered anyone, now, has he?" Tom almost fainted, but managed to avoid it. It could not be… he was not a member of the Circle of Darkness… yet Miravez had told him he had both marks. Not much feeling like listening to any more, Tom walked away toward his purlieu in the library. He felt a little dizzy.

That one not-so-little fact did not make him a Dark wizard… did it?

********************

Tom spent as much time as he could that summer studying the Chamber of Secrets, but he also had to keep it from the teachers. When he was not reading, he was usually out on the grounds, enjoying the nice weather. He was the only student staying at Hogwarts over the summer, so the teachers allowed him to sit at the staff table. He had some very interesting debates about philosophy with Professor Twiddy, the Head of Ravenclaw House, and all the discussions with the teachers were enjoyable. He sent an owl to Diagon Alley to order his school things, and they arrived in the middle of July.

Slowly, he began to forget about the argument in the staff room, and it only returned to his mind when he was unable to get to sleep late at night. He had not mentioned it to Nepenthe--indeed, Nepenthe did not know that Tom had killed his father in the first place. Suffering in silence was the only option, and living at the orphanage had taught him this skill.

The day before the start of term, Tom came down to tea to see two extra people at the staff table. One was tall and pretty, while the other was very small, sitting in the former's lap. Seeing him, the tall newcomer stood up, looking ecstatic. "Tom Riddle? Is that you?"

"It is indeed," said Dumbledore. It took Tom a few seconds to recognize her.

"Mrs. McGonagall?" he said incredulously.

Medéa McGonagall nodded enthusiastically and rushed over to meet him. Minerva, who had grown considerably, eyeballed him with curiosity. She had grown a head full of extremely curly black hair. "How have you been, Tom?" Medéa asked.

"Fine," Tom shrugged. "You?"

"Great! Minnie's a lot of trouble, but she's worth it… always getting into things, bless her! Want to hold her?" Tom nodded tentatively and Medéa placed the little girl in his arms. Minerva puffed up her face so that she looked like a chipmunk. Tom felt very uncomfortable, but he decided that she was at least better than Aragog.

"Why are you two here?" Tom asked.

Medéa sighed. "It's bad business, Tom… afraid I can't tell you. All I'll say is I'll be here until about February."

Tom cocked an eyebrow suspiciously, but made no comment. Meanwhile, Minerva was tugging on his ear rather forcefully. "Booboo," she said loudly.

"And my eardrum's going to have one if you keep on pulling on my ear like that," Tom winced. He tried to pry her hand off his ear, but she had it in a vice grip. The teachers laughed, and Medéa managed to coax Minerva to let go.

"Sorry about that," she sighed, taking Minerva. "Told you she gets into things."

"It's okay," Tom said, sitting down at the table.

Medéa nodded. She conjured a roomy playpen for Minerva and sat down as well. "So, Tom, what have you been doing with your life since I last saw you?"

Tom gave Medéa a very vague outline of the goings-on of the previous year and a half, and listened idly as she explained what she had been doing. Medéa chatted with the teachers once she was done with him, and Tom, growing a little bored, looked down into his teacup. The tea leaves were lying all over the bottom. Tom swirled the cup around as Professor Camden had taught them, narrowed his eyes, and looked past the tea leaves.

He then said something that would have made Hannah put a bar of soap in his mouth. The teachers looked at him, dumbfounded. Tom ignored them, staring into the cup in horror. Instead of symbols, the tea leaves had formed words.

IT IS COMING SOON
THE THIRD AND FINAL
BREAK OF HEART
COMES WITH THE SNOW
YOUR LOSS WILL BE INFINITE
AND WITH IT GOES YOUR INNOCENCE
LET THE SPECTER'S BATTLE BEGIN

"TOM!" Professor Sevigny said in shock. "Where did you hear that word?"

Dumbledore, however, ignored the fact that Tom had used a swear word that most seventh-years didn't know. "What's the matter?" he asked swiftly.

"I--oh, it's nothing," Tom lied, though for once it was not at all convincing. "I--er… well… I have a headache. I think I'll… turn in early…" Before anyone could ask him any more questions, Tom stood up sharply and dashed up to his dormitory. "Let the Specter's battle begin," he muttered, shivering uncontrollably. He was never wrong when he performed divination, and if a battle with the Specter meant what he thought it did…

As soon as he reached his bedroom, he set down the teacup on his bedside table and was rather violently sick in the washroom. How was he supposed to fight the Circle of Darkness that winter? He certainly was not ready to do it yet. He had never heard of the Circle of Darkness winning, but it seemed to him that the twelfth and final battle should be the one that chose whether or not the world fell into darkness. In any case, he was in trouble.

Just how much, he did not know.

********************

Indeed, over the first three months of school, the teachers seemed to be trying to prepare him for something. The teachers gave him special assignments that seemed to be geared toward self-defense and dueling, and Tom was sure the prefects had been instructed to keep an eye on him. Nathan Potter started escorting him from class to class, and as Tom was supposed to be watching Myrtle, he suddenly found himself being smothered by Potters. The teachers treated him rather formally, and Tom got the impression they wanted to keep their distance in case he actually was part of the other Circle.

Tom only found solace in two things; the library and Lili Po. Seeing as Tom's closest Slytherin friends had grown fonder of each other than of him, Tom found himself spending more and more time with the Ravenclaw girl. He even cut back on his studies a little--though not very much. Tom always put aside some time on Saturdays to go for a fly around the school grounds with his friend, and she had picked up his Chinese lessons as soon as she returned to school. Tom was getting very good at the language, but he could not for the life of him understand the writing system.

Somehow--Tom could not quite say how--he and Lili went from close friends to best friends. Being best friends with Lili, however, was quite different from being best friends with one of the Slytherins. His Slytherin friends were fond of playing established, "ordinary" games, such as Exploding Snap and Gobstones. With Lili, he was more likely to be called off to explore the secret passages of the school, play an imaginary game (which he had not done since he was four years old), or have a rather raucous match of wizard chess. The Slytherins disliked debating current topics, whereas Lili reveled in it, proving herself to be a great arguer. She was so spontaneous that she sometimes sent owls to Tom at two in the morning asking if he wanted a fencing match in the trophy room.

It was after one of these nighttime duels in the middle of December that Tom could be found sitting at his dormitory window, staring out over the grounds. A heavy snow was beginning to fall, covering Hogwarts and the surrounding area in a thick, frigid white blanket. He had just turned fifteen a few days ago, but he was, as usual, awkwardly tall for his age. He was at least six feet tall by now, possibly even an inch taller than that.

With a sigh, Tom ran a hand through his hair and watched the snow fall. Fifteen, already. Where had the time gone?

"Masssster?" asked someone timidly.

Tom looked down and saw Nepenthe staring up at him, golden eyes glowing slightly. "Hello, Nepenthe," he said softly.

"Masssster, I have ssssome unpleasant news," Nepenthe hissed quietly. "As I was exploring the ssssschool thissss afternoon, I happened to hear the other ssssnakessss talking… They told me that there is a placcccce in the casssstle where none of them go, for a monsssster lives there and kills all who come near."

Tom shrugged. "Sounds like Aragog," he muttered. "I'll have a talk with Rubeus about it, then you won't have to worry. Okay?"

"All right," Nepenthe said, and he slithered into his basket. Tom turned back to the window and gazed out again, wondering why he felt like something bad was going to happen.

The next morning, Tom woke up to find the dormitory very active. The other Slytherin boys were busy pulling on cloaks, mittens, boots, and hats, and it took Tom a few seconds to recall that today was the first Hogsmeade Saturday of the year. Tom had never visited Hogsmeade, preferring to stay in the library and study. Yawning and stretching, he got out of bed and watched Francis and Richard squabble.

"You coming this time, Tom?" Adrian asked curiously, tugging on a hat over his curly yellow hair.

"No," Tom said, as usual. Adrian and Zuhayr rolled their eyes in sync. After the other boys had gone, Tom changed into his robes and headed off to the library, his bookbag over his shoulder. Just as he was opening his Arithmancy book, the library door burst open so noisily that Mr. Lamont threw the newcomer a dirty look.

Tom looked up to see Lili running toward him, her red cloak and long black hair flying out behind her. "Studying again, are you?" she asked with a smile.

"Er, yes," Tom replied.

"No you're not," Lili grinned. "You're coming to Hogsmeade, and you're going to like it. Trust me."

"I'm not coming," Tom said without thinking.

Lili seized his arm. "You're coming," she insisted, her eyes dancing. "You're coming or else I'm going to use the Jelly-Legs curse on you and make you come. Now follow me." She dragged Tom out of his chair and out the library door, leaving Mr. Lamont staring after them irritably.

After stopping into the Slytherin common room to pick up Tom's cloak, they headed down to the entrance hall, where all the other students were waiting to be let out of the double doors. A bell rang somewhere, and they headed out of the school. Hogsmeade was a short walk away, and when they got there, Tom was amazed. Immediately, he felt very stupid for not coming earlier. He wanted to explore every shop and look at everything the little town had to offer. "Want to go to the Three Broomsticks and get something to drink?" Lili asked.

Tom nodded, and Lili led him into a crowded pub, which was doing a roaring trade despite the early hour. There was nowhere to sit, so Lili ordered two bottled butterbeers to go and they left the pub, chatting. Over the next hour, they explored the post office, Dervish and Banges, and Honeydukes, and were just on their way to see the town museum when Serena Birch appeared. "Tom?" she asked. "Can I talk to you? There's something I didn't get yesterday in Arithmancy. Could you help me?"

"Sure," Tom said, and he turned to Lili. "You go ahead," he said, "I'll meet you on the town green in a few minutes, okay?"

"Okay," Lili said agreeably. She walked away, looking over her shoulder once or twice. Lili frowned slightly. She was not sure why, but something in the air made her feel nervous. Very nervous. She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and sped up a little bit, shivering.

As she reached the town green, Lili sat down heavily on a bench, watching the passersby and waiting for Tom to turn up. Now the jumpy feeling had reached a fever pitch, so intense that she was almost nauseous. Ever since she had had that dream about seeing herself die, she had had a lot of trouble with those feelings of uneasiness, but this was too much. She had never had it this badly before.

There was a sudden shouting noise nearby. Lili looked up to see a man in jet-black robes wielding a wand. "The Circle is complete, I say!" he yelled madly. "The Dark Heir is coming!" The witches and wizards nearby were backing away, screaming. Apparently, his words meant something to them, but Lili had no idea what he was talking about. All she knew was that her gut told her to leave, and fast.

Lili stood up slowly and tried to duck through the crowd and away from the green. To her horror, the madman made a sudden lunge for the crowd, right in her direction, and his hand closed around her wrist. "Help!" she started to shout, but her captor clamped a hand tightly over her mouth. She willed the witches and wizards around her to come to her aid, but they were being repelled by some invisible force the madman had conjured.

Meanwhile, he continued to rave. "The twelfth and greatest Dark Heir has arrived!" he roared, keeping Lili in a semi-headlock at his side. "On comes darkness from here! No one will be spared! Mudbloods and purebloods will all suffer! This--" he indicated Lili "--is an example of what is to come!"

"This isn't happening to me," Lili thought desperately. "Someone, please…"

The madman let go of her, and she cried out for help at the top of her lungs, but to no avail. No one knew how to break through the invisible wall. Lili made a break for it, but she had never been a very good runner.

"This happens to those who oppose the Dark Heir!" the man shrieked. "Crucio!"

Just as Lili had almost got away, she collapsed into the snow, shuddering with pain. It was as though white-hot lacerations were splitting along her skin; as though hot water was being poured on her, was running through her veins; as though some sort of animal was ripping her to pieces. Every bone in her body felt like it had shattered; the pain was a sting, an ache, a burn, all in one, and magnified a thousand times. The agony came tumbling from her lips in an anguished scream, and she felt herself twitching and flailing, just as she had seen happen to Tom in their second year…

The madman lifted the curse, and just as relief was washing over her, Lili was possessed by it once more. He left it there for an eternity… every atom in her body was searing with that bizarre pain. It was a full ten minutes before the curse was lifted again. Lili struggled to get up, but she could not. Three words stood out in her mind, three words that made her heart sink even lower. "Such is fate."

********************

"I don't really get that exponent thing, either," Serena was saying. "Can you explain--" She halted as the air was rent by a piercing, continuous scream.

"What's that?" Tom asked, his stomach dropping. The scream was unearthly and haunting, and Tom had a horrible feeling that he recognized the voice. It was coming from the town green. "Serena, get a teacher!"

Serena did not need telling twice. She dashed off toward the school, and Tom made for the crowded green. After ten minutes, the screaming stopped, and Tom managed to push through the crowd and see what was happening. A man in dusty travelling robes was standing over a small, prone figure in a red cloak, his wand out. "No mercy!" he shrieked. "Crucio!"

The girl in the red cloak started screaming again, and Tom drew out his wand. "Stupefy!" he shouted, aiming it at the madman. He collapsed, and his victim stopped screaming. As her head lolled in his direction, Tom saw the face, and his worst suspicions were confirmed. He fell to his knees at her side, taking her shoulders in his hands. "LILI! Lili, say something!" Lili was, to say the least, in bad shape. She looked frighteningly pale, and her eyes looked glassy.

Lili coughed, and Tom winced as a little blood came out of her mouth. "Tom?" she asked, her voice hoarse.

Tom's chest felt like it had been filled with warm water. He could not lose Lili, she was all he had left… "Lili--hold on, you'll be okay."

"Must be a family tradition," Lili sighed, coughing again. "Dying via the Cruciatus Curse… first Papa, now me…"

"No, Lili… you'll be okay, I promise… just stay with me for a while, and Madam Viola will right you…"

"She won't," Lili spluttered, some more blood coming out of her throat. "Tom--Tom, I'm sorry, I can't stay here--"

Tom's knuckles whitened around her shoulders, and a lump was rising in his throat. "Lili, you can! Please!"

Lili drew in a breath and released it slowly. "Tom… I love you."

"You what?"

A small smile crept across her face. "No, not romantically… but you're the best friend I've ever had, Tom… I don't want to leave you, but I can't stop it. Just… remember me…"

At this point, Tom completely forgot he hated hugs. He embraced Lili fiercely, not caring if he was teased for the rest of his life for it. "I love you, Lili… oh, God, please don't die!"

"I can't help it…"

"You don't understand!" Tom wailed. "You're all I have! Please! Jesus Christ, stay with me!"

"Tom… I can't…" Tom let go of her, and she looked at him glassily. "Don't forget me," she said simply. At this point, she was overcome by a horrible coughing fit, and when her head fell back, it did not rise again.

"LILI! Lili, please… oh, Lili, I'm sorry!" Tom whispered, hugging her again. Tears were coursing down his face, and for once he did not worry about looking like an idiot. He just sat there, cradling his friend in his arms and murmuring her name, as though willing her to wake up. The onlookers just stared, transfixed, too stunned to do anything.

At that moment, Professor Dumbledore stepped into the circle that had formed around the area, Serena Birch in tow. He saw the unconscious madman lying at one end of the circle, and Tom and Lili at the other. Forcing himself to stay calm, he crossed over to his students and placed a hand on Tom's shoulder. "Is she all right?" he asked.

Tom looked up, his eyes shimmering with tears. "Three in a row," he said softly. "The only three people I've ever loved are dead… Mum, Hannah… Oh, God, what's wrong with me?"

Dumbledore's face went pale. "She's at peace now, Tom," he replied quietly. "Let me take her."

Tom reluctantly stood up, and he watched blankly as the professor scooped Lili up and instructed the town police on what to do with the madman. There was what felt like an empty space in his chest, as though someone had ripped his heart out and thrown it into a gutter. And yet, even in his misery, he remembered something.

Professor Camden had been right.

Chapter 20...

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